“Grief is like the ocean; it comes on waves ebbing and flowing. Sometimes the water is calm, and sometimes it is overwhelming. All we can do is learn to swim.” ~Vicki Harrison

Death is, without a doubt, the most difficult thing a person can face. It causes us to crumble. It makes us fall to our knees. Some people are so important in our lives that the prospect of life without them feels daunting and incapacitating. Divorces and breakups can be worse than death in some cases, because the person who died to us is still alive and haunts our each thought.

How I feel every moment?

I feel so lost, I feel as if I have died. My whole world has collapsed. I am terrified that I wouldn’t be able to support myself. I feel lonely, I feel sad, I feel a variety of emotions at the same time. But the ONLY feeling I cant get out of mind is the feeling of loss. I have lost everything that I thought I would eventually have…the life and more importantly HIM. His words, voice, scent all is gone…I may perhaps not be only one, millions of people have experienced the “death” of their loved ones without ever having to plan their funeral.

I keep going back and forth between missing him and hating him for leaving. At times the mixed emotions make me feel like I am literally sinking into insanity. One moment I would cry and the next I yell. There are days when the pain is so unbearable and I think that the world has ended and I’m left behind alone and miserable…. There is no way of getting around the process I think…

Its a roller coaster journey……… will I survive? This is still a Question Mark!